Carving out a corner to post random crap.
Intention:
Mind! Body! Soul!
We are magnetic personalities to whom people are drawn. (Hey! Did you know the best way to
learn how to live in the moment is to love a depressive?) Because it's no secret: My horribly wrong, 9-year-long turn has led me to you.
Reinvention:
Release! Freedom! Permission!
You said if I were truly serious about upholding the clouds, I'd've built pillars by now.
"Dilettante," you called me.
"Alpha Bitch," I replied.
In unison we announced, "I believe in you."
two wholes, ort. Tap the vein. the waiting-for-my-better-other-half is poisoned thinking! i don't want you to need me. Do you feel the pull? how this bond is supposed to work is you seek out my companionship because you like me. Family of origin. not because i can do something for you. the issue here is to flow, not crash. Arise! Sacrifice makes for a happy waif. you have all you need. We go through needles. i don't even have to be in the picture, but i'd like to have a place somewhere in the little world you've built. Medicine for better living.
Shiver and Shudder and Moan
oh, and i made this:
Benny showed me how to concoct a remedy to take back my life. I'd grown withdrawn and *bunchy because I gave away my power to someone else's dream. Benny could tell by the copious notes I scribbled in my book I hadn't a clue how to steer my boat.
"You seem like the sort who'll stick around," he said. "Don't stay long."
spirit freestyles
she throws out random
words 
that create pretty
sentences
in the hope that
you pick an
image
to which you
cleave
as one would a
rope
a lie is a lie
no matter how much gilt
it hides behind
*as opposed to springy
Hold on to that feeling of lightness and electricity because it 
can't be bottled or believed. [Fierce or fears?] Your illuminated halo disintegrates the world. (Be Mean To Keep 'Em Keen!) Walk into nothing and the sun will find you all the same. {I like cutting hearts out of garbage because it reminds me of hunger.}
Go on. Tell yourself a different story.
I don't like telling another person's story. Not if I wasn't an active participant in it or given written permission. Reckon it's due to my dislike of fictional memoirs and the scourge of humanity: fake news. I also realize this self-imposed creative restraint is the death knell for a writer. I go back-and-forth on the guidelines and bylaws of my little literary quirk. But then again, we steal from one another and make things out of the throwaway lies lines overheard while we wait for coffee, the bus, the rain to stop as we're huddled in a doorway. The truth goes something like this, so help yourself:
Oh my God. I can hear you laugh. It's high-pitched and deliciously girlish and I love it! You've always had a silent snicker until now.
I'm saging the whole goddamn neighborhood.
My birds say you've come out of your shell because this is our year to be counted as one.
I'm being vague, huh?
Seed the heavens with your intent.
I'd rather go hungry than taste disappointment.
How many people offered to help you today?
I've walked the nighttime streets of Gamla Stan in these shoes.
The ocean holds a certain uncertain truth.
I'm bloated and missing me some trees something fierce.
That is deep shit if you're speaking from the heart.
Language is in flux. My 12 hours of closure? Thought and memory.
Darla riffs on what Love is and isn't:
First off, anything covered in hearts is a Top Seller down at the old Prairie View Drive-In Swap Meet. Love – a favorite topic, for sure. Love is a messy mix of hormonal teenage angst (ah, the rush of that first crush!) and hating the other so much you wanna bash her/him/genderless entity over the head 
with a skillet. Oh delicious pummeling of the soul! The push and pull and psychic upheaval is what's intoxicating, not safety, security, doilies, or roofs-over-heads. Love is Insanity and Total Loss of the Self. It's like this: You need to be in each other's skin one minute. The next, you've put oceans and continents between you to prevent anodized steel from meeting grey matter. Expand, contract … Love is a living thing that takes stage directions from No One. Come here – Go away – Stay outta my light – You Are the Light. Love is a challenge; it's a test. Love pushes all your buttons, rubs you in all the right and wrong ways, and puts into question EVERYTHING you believe. Think you have control over all matters of a wet and sticky Venusian nature? WRONG. Love confounds, concusses, and causes wild weight fluctuations. Love isn't pretty and we all look stupid when we're in it. We dipshits wouldn't want it any other way. Just look at all those shoppers snatching up anything heart-shaped and schmoopie.
watching you speak to a packed house. You are dressed in your best white button down, blue jeans, and grey suede shoes. Your thick, wavy hair is still black while your beard is entirely white. These things happen after years of turning over rocks. But what knowledge and beauty you found in the loam! You discovered The Five that formed the foundation which supports you tonight:
Have I bought into any number of myths concerning beauty? Do I truly believe beauty comes in all shapes, shades, and sizes? Is everyone beautiful?
here goes:
Ok Melody, listen up. Truthie Ruthie here to help an old friend.
Semi-Daily Scribbles 